The Diet God by 鈴木強

September 4, 2011

The Diet God

“It’s just not fair. Why am I the only one out of the twenty-five starting the diet not to lose weight at all? I know there are various roads to progress. And there are those who reached their ideal style and those poor buggers who get far too thin. There are also some who don’t change very much at all. But I’m just rubbish. My waist hasn’t shrunk whatsoever. I have no figure, no shape at all, and it’s beyond a joke. Why am I the only one not to be a saved by the hands of the Diet God? He even comes close. I get nervous thinking he’s coming to help me then he reaches out to the one next door. I can see why he’d choose them and not me though. On one side there’s Blacky with her great skin and on the other side Browny and her sexy tan. The only thing good about me is that I’m white. Even so, with this shape I’m just a white pig. Please Diet God, do something for me!”

And that’s when the Diet God reached out his hand. He chose Whitey, not Blacky on the left or Browny to the right. He held her in his hand and stared at her as if he was performing some kind of evaluation. Whitey held her breathe.

“White paint, you really are good for nothing,” the Diet God sighed.

Whitey is still a fatty.

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3 Responses to “The Diet God by 鈴木強”


  1. i don’t understand this, and feel stupid because of it. could you explain please?

  2. nikzback Says:

    i had to read it a couple of times before i understood. it’s a box of paints and the white one is talking. the god is the painter/owner. white is not happy because she never gets chosen, so she’s still full or fat. she also seems a bit jealous about black and brown.

    maybe i need to change something if it doesn’t click!


  3. ohhh yes. i was picturing the ‘paint’ as wall paint, so the diet god would be a painter decorator, which was a bit weird cos you don’t get much brown and black wall paint. i think the problem is i couldn’t really link ‘fatness’ to ‘fullness’.

    still, it’s a neat idea, always funny to anthropomorphise inanimate objects : )


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